Friday, May 7, 2010

Personal space. I wants it.

MEMO
To: People who crowd up next to or behind me in line.

Back off.

Ta!
Jen

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Seriously? Crowding me will not make the line go faster. Maintain your distance, at least 12 inches but preferably 24 inches, at all times.

Do you not get it? Let me spell it out for you.
  • If you can move my hair (which is short) with your breath (which is gross), you are too close.
  • If you brush up against my purse (which is held close to my body), you are too close.
  • If by turning my head I could give you cooties, you are too close.
  • If I can smell your deodorant (or lack thereof), you are too close.
  • If by shifting my weight I bump you with my elbow (for which, in all honesty, I don't really feel I should apologize, because I am not the one who caused that unfortunate accident, that is your fault, you rude space-hogging cretin, however MY parents raised a courteous citizen so I beg your pardon), YOU ARE TOO FRICKIN' CLOSE.

I feel I have made my point.

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